Monthly Archives: September 2012

Arrow Sharp

Singular is the mark that lies,

Straight as the arrow flies,

Unwavering in its aim,

How ungodly is its fame.

Consume it does with ardent cruelty,

Laughing with unbridled gaiety,

Pleasure it takes to scorn the soul,

Pleading and running, evermore.

Restless are the ties that lie,

Emotions binding them too tight,

Squirm all you want begotten foes,

Let’s see how you escape my throes.

Truth

On the 26th of November, 2007, I wrote the following:

I am haunted by a emotion which is not mine, a mind which strives to mischief, a heart which leaps and bounds without regard. Its a strange world indeed which simply does not seem to work the way you envisioned.

I have a deep desire to seep into the world I constructed through countless hours of wakefulness. A world where logic and heart are in perfect harmony, a world where things happen as I want, a world which is filled with fun, music and loads of full-throated laughter.

I want to be able to sing and make merry without inhibition. I want to be able to laugh and love without being hurt. I want to be able to explore and discover without losing faith. I want to be able to live the life I want.

I am getting bored of myself, I am getting irked by my own presence, I have become cynical, criticising a world which is simply embracing change. I yearn for the simple innocent life where one works and be happy. I am beginning to dislike change; and that does not bode well in the era we live in.

5 years later with an MBA, working in a multinational and in a function I truly enjoy, I have to admit the feeling has just aggravated. Nothing I do seems to turn out. No plan of mine seems to work. Big or small, it seems the universe has conspired to go against me in every step I take. Personal or professional, the big boss is rubbing his hands with glee on how to wreck havoc on my next dream/ambition.

Boredom turned to apathy and then plain disgust. People around set a goal, work towards them and achieve them. I set a goal, work towards them and achieve the opposite. My cynicism has extended to every person I meet, including near and dear ones. Change is something I am getting to dread, for the negativities it brings, instead of embracing for the positivity. The simple, innocent life so wished for and worked towards seem further than ever, in fact, the light at the end of the road seems much nearer, which one will win?

The chase continues

The art of self-protection

How much of self-protection should we undertake. There was a situation recently where the ultimate suggestion was self-protection or “covering your ***” as the colloquial terminology is; should be paramount regardless of the situation or personnel involved. Basically the argument went that regardless of how close knit a group or how detailed a situation; a person who cannot cover himself is a person who cannot survive in this world.

The opinion was cast from a professional point of view but is it valid even when looked from that light? If I am in a team, should I be covering myself and making sure I am safe at every step? Looked at from one angle, this approach makes sense. The world is an increasingly competitive one and given the higher cost of living etc, the man who is aggressive and makes sure his contributions are known far and wide is the man who rises to the top. Elegance, a sense of propriety and modesty are reserved for the perpetual rich who do not have to lift a finger or for the man who is happy with what he has and does not wish for more. The vast majority of us do not fall into these categories and thus would have to fight every step of the way.

Looking at the other side provides a very different picture. A place where one needs to watch every word/action said/done is a place where productivity will never be high. Humans being fallible, will always make mistakes, and a place where mistakes are not allowed or are heavily penalized is not going to be one which can hold on to its people. One might argue that in a professional setting, a certain level of perfection should have been achieved, especially after a number of years of work. It’s a perfectly valid argument and deserves it’s due merit. However, the reference here is to the ability to experiment and explore beyond the realm of perfection achieved; and that would only be possible if mistakes are made and learnt from